Archive for the ‘Thursday 13’ Category
Thursday 13: Cheating edition
Yeah, I am cheating. No 13 here just a squeal and a dance and a share. MYLA BY MOONLIGHT is a finalist in the Fantasy Romance Category of the 2011 EPIC eBook Awards Competition. So I am sharing a bit of that book with you as my cheating 13.
MYLA BY MOONLIGHT
Her palm slid easily into his and she was struck by how large his hand was. It seemed only a moment ago she had accepted her charge of a squawking infant. Now a grown man, her charge was no soft-skinned babe. He drew her to sit near the cold fireplace in a soft high-backed chair and motioned for Bryton to join them. Taric lowered himself beside her on a low wooden stool. His friend settled into the opposite chair and she realized Taric had given her his normal seat. She started to rise. A firm hand on her arm stilled her and she looked at him.
How had she never noticed the way his hair curled about his ears? The deep lion-gold borrowed a shimmer from the torchlight and shone like sunlight against an autumn grove. Her fingers itched to touch it. Was it as soft as it appeared?
Myla did not realize her thoughts had strayed from the conversation until Bryton’s deep chuckle rang out. “I wish I’d known the jag was you, Myla. I might not have had to spend the night with damp blankets.”
She remembered quite well the night he spoke of although she didn’t know about his wet bedding. At the time, her mind had been filled with keeping razor-sharp wolf-teeth from her master. “I did not mean to frighten you, Bryton. Did Taric not tell you there was no danger? It was only the wolf I sought.”
“And you got him, too. There wasn’t much left after you’d finished.”
Eyes narrowed, she fixed the young man with a predatory stare. The smile slid from his lips and a gulp worked his throat. “I spare no mercy for any man, woman or beast who threatens the prince. Heed that, Sir Bryton, and you shall never need fear my claws.”
A low snort sounded from her right but she didn’t move her gaze from the wide-eyed man seated before her. Slowly he nodded and a little curl lifted the side of his mouth. “Formidable bodyguard you have, Tar—beautiful and fierce, such a lovely but deadly combination.”
Text funnies
13 texts from the site Texts from Last Night because no matter how bad my day is, these make me smile. I was boring in College. I worked. And how do these people not have alcohol poisoning?
(619): Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said “I want soup” got off my dick and make top ramen.
(973): Quick question… Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
(513): the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
(847): Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say “oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago”
(774): Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands.
(205): I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
(443): There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
(856): Honestly, I don’t care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
(936): He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex….he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn’t even know
(515): you had “tips for anal sex” in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
(410): She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn’t find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
(408): if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
(604): when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Thursday 13: COMING CLEAN
Top 13 reasons why you should own COMING CLEAN from @CarinaPress
13- BBQ ribs and cornbread. Summer food for summer fun #ComingClean
12- It’s better than doing your own laundry #ComingClean
11- If one man is hot, two are hotter #ComingClean
10- boy parts touch girl parts, boy parts touch boy parts, lots of parts touch lots of parts #ComingClean
9- three words—BISEXUAL SHOWER BJ #ComingClean
8- Hot Latin dancing CLOTHED! Hot sheet dancing UNCLOTHED! #ComingClean
7- Sports analogies used to discuss buttsecks. Wanna know who plays catcher? #ComingClean
6- Rated everywhere 4 stars, 5 blue ribbons and TOP PICK! It’s scorching! #ComingClean
5- You’ll never guess where the SCREW ends up! #ComingClean
4- Vivi, Grant and Cade are a triangle in all ways. #ComingClean
3- It will make your heart sigh and your panties damp. #ComingClean
2- 3 people, 9 orgasms, 114 pages and only $2.99 after 25% off! #ComingClean
1- Because married doesn’t mean ‘dead’, sometimes it means ‘more’. #ComingClean
Go get COMING CLEAN NOW… then buy batteries.
Thursday 13- Lines from(Talk Dirty to Me)
“Tell me what you want. Talk dirty to me.”
Biologist Nora MacGregor is frantic when she loses her dissertation notes on female sexuality—and some very personal fantasies. Then a sinful stranger calls with a wicked proposition: if she talks dirty to him, he’ll return her notes, page by page. “James” allows Nora to explore her deepest desires and challenges her clinical ideas about sex. But James can’t give her the loving touches she finds in her budding relationship with Dr. Jarod Reed.
Jarod seized an opportune moment to fulfill his desire for Nora by becoming the mysterious James. While the anonymous, erotic phone sessions are unforgettable, Jarod longs to tell Nora he wants more than just talk. But how can he confess his deception without it costing him the chance to make their fantasies a reality?
13 lines give or take…
The cell phone’s chirp interrupted her mental tirade. She glanced at the screen then flipped it open with a snap.
“You son of a bitch!”
A sharp masculine inhale rang loud in her ear. “Nora, let me expla—”
“How dare you send me something like that to my office! Anybody could have opened that package.”
Seductive laughter poured over her, richer than imported chocolate. “So you got my little gift? I was wondering. I did include thirty pages. I sort of lost count how many I owed you and took a wild guess.”
She flopped back on the futon and picked up the hard plastic package. “I got them and a surprise. I almost opened the box in front of Dr. Salih.”
The laughter turned wicked, a razor-fine edge of devilment that scored along her irritation and carved it away. She palmed her forehead. “James, what in the hell were you thinking, sending me a vibrator?”
“Come on, sweetheart, I’d think the purpose is obvious.”
Thursday 13 – Getting Goofy
Not that Goofy. The other kind, silly, cutting up, hanging loose and just being… stupid.
13 things that make me laugh or in some way tickle my silly bone.
STAR TREK as you’ve never seen it
Thursday 13…ish. TALK DIRTY TO ME
I’m melting. It is too damned hot to move. 13 lines cut off in a weird place no matter where I looked so bonus lines, but not many. Enjoy!
TALK DIRTY TO ME by Inez Kelley and Ginny Glass
Coming from Carina Press July 19th
“God, your skin is like silk. My hands are stroking down your stomach. Run the Bullet around your bellybutton, slow. That’s my tongue, Nora. Trace your hip all the way down, sweetheart. No, I hear you turning it up. Leave it alone, medium setting. I like to take my time.”
Goosebumps erupted along her tummy, the soft vibrations channeling lust through her body, igniting a growing need at her core.
“Go right to your bikini line. Drag the tip just across it. Now up to your navel again.”
“James, please…”
“Shh, let me explore you. Turn it up just a bit. I want to nibble a line straight down your hip to your leg.”
A whimper eked out before she could stop it. James chuckled.
“I’ve got a taste of you and now I’m starving for more. I want you to slide the Bullet across your inner thighs. There and only there.”
She did what he asked, shivering. Her nipples ached with delicious pain, and her wet pussy thumped in empty need.
“Now what?”
“Imagine my fingers there, skimming across the muscles. Back and forth, back and forth. Don’t you dare touch anywhere else.”
She fell into the rhythm of his words, rocked to the low bass of a voice that had no body. He was everywhere, but nowhere. It was deliriously wicked and entirely not enough. Sweat covered her body.
“Touch me more.”
Get it, love it, buy batteries.
Thursday 13 #AutoRejections
I had waaaaaaaaaay too much fun on Twitter last night not to share some of my favorites today. The hashtag is my creation because my brain was melting and I needed to laugh. The idea is stuff that would automatically be rejected by an editor or agent in a romance novel.
I got silly. Then more people joined in! So here are some of my favorites. If they are not accredited with a @, then *I* said it.
1- If your hero announces “RELEASE THE KRAKEN” and drops his pants #AutoRejection
2- If your heroine screams her brother’s name in bed #AutoRejection
3- The word TALLYWACKER #AutoRejection
4- @jodie_who: When the ‘secret baby/pregnancy’ is a secret to the heroine as well. #AutoRejection
5- If your hero ever utters the words “You’re tighter than a sheep” #AutoRejection
6- @ginnyglass: If the marriage of convenience involves a bride or groom that is inflatable #AutoRejection
7- @jodie_who: When the hero expects the heroine to get along with his sex doll. When a hero HAS a sex doll #AutoRejection
8- If the hero sparkles and runs faster than lightning… oh wait, nevermind #AutoRejection
9- @WendySparrow: If the enviable long silky mustache is on your heroine…. #AutoRejection
10- @ginnyglass: If your makeover scenes involve labia reduction surgery, please dear God #AutoRejection
11- @VivianArend: If the heroine’s 5 o’clock shadow is heavier than the heroes #AutoRejection
12- @katiebabs: If the hero wants the heroine to meet his son and it’s a sock puppet name Norm #autorejection
13- @ginnyglass: When the third in your menage is the hero’s ventriloquist dummy #AutoRejection
BONUS! Because these are too good to miss…
@jodie_who: The fact the hero NAMES his penis. #AutoRejection
If your shifter is a dog and licks his own balls #AutoRejection
@katiebabs: When the hero breaks out the penis pump during the first sex scene #autorejection
@EbonyMcKenna: “dear sir/madam agent. I wrote this vampire fiction-novel in my own blood..” #autorejection
@ginnyglass: if tattoo’d above the hero’s belt line – “caution: choking hazard” or “may contain nuts” #AutoRejection
If each member of your menage is a different gender #autorejection
Got to love twitter when you are brain fried!
Thursday 13: Random Thoughts
I have 3/4 of a teaspoon on brainpower left. This summer is just sucking the life out of me. S0 a quick random glimpse into whatever thought pops into my head.
13: I hate mosquitoes with a hate as hot as the flames of a crackwhore’s crotch. *itchitchitch*
12: Why is there no government stipend for writers/mothers? There should be.
11: Too much sex toy browsing with Ginny Glass last night (for prize baskets, people, mind out of the gutter). Dreamed I was in a vibe warehouse. It hummed.
10: Didn’t sleep well and Am grumpy today. Not too different than normal lately.
9: I am so far behind on technology it isn’t funny. I feel like the caveman in the Geico commercials.
8: I miss the mountains.
7: I want to write and write and yet, my brain is in a meh loop and I don’t like anything that comes out.
6: I make a killer pan of homemade lasagna. Now if it wasn’t so damn hot I might feel like eating.
5: Sometimes I live too much in my stories and then get confused when the real world intrudes.
4: The last few books I have read left me wondering what the hell??
3: I want a nose job like a teenage boy wants laid.
2: I dodged a professional bullet yesterday and feel guilty because I feel so relieved.
1: Pajamas are wonderful clothes and should be given more respect.
Thursday 13:The SPAM edition
First off, until the next comment is added, there have been 666 approved messages on this blog. *gulp* Does that say something or what?
Okay, moving on…
I despise SPAM and it makes no sense to me whatsoever. We chicks write about a lot of varied things so it is hard to tell what word we might choose in a specific place but whatever it is, it must trip some SPAMbot’s trigger because we get some weird-assed SPAM here. So for my Thursday 13… SPAM!
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13- Okay, really, we write romance novels. Romance heroes DO NOT need viagra.
Some time ago, I really needed to buy a good house for my organization but I didn’t have enough cash and could not buy anything. Thank heaven my fellow suggested to take the mortgage loans at reliable bank. Therefore, I did so and used to be happy with my financial loan.
12 – I am happy for you AmandaMortgage, I really am. Now go away.
?????? ?? ??????
?????? ?? ???????
????????? ???
?????? ????? ?? ?????????
11- uhm.. okay then
Greatings, ,
Gracias – Worker
10- Nice try, Worker. The email of a free porn site adds mucho credibility to your post and what a kreaytive speller!
okey but i’m lost hahah just how? do u achieve so many mobsters since i just have 4 ( including my mafia! ) plus i doubt im planning to achieve higher addtionally i’m level nineteen plus gaining greater thus precisely how do i increase my mafia members quick at such a low lvl Or is this a bad website to question?
9- Which chick used the words FACEBOOK and attracted that loser?
I can see that you are an expert at your field! I am launching a website soon, and your information will be very useful for me.. Thanks for all your help and wishing you all the success.
8- Thanks for the compliment Goldwizard. I expect to see shared royalties, got it?
I apologise, but, in my opinion, you commit an error. I can prove it.
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I apologise, but, in my opinion, you are not right. I am assured. Write to me in PM, we will discuss.
7- riiiiiiiiiight I will jump on THAT offer to PM you, idiot.
I don’t know if we each have a destiny, or if we’re all just floating around accidentally?like on a breeze.
6- *headpat* It’s alright, Forrest. Nice credit check link in the email too.
Lost was initially such a good tv show, nothing else on the telly actually comes close.
5- Never saw it but thank so much onlinetv for stopping by!
Howdy, your site is on air in the radio! Good job mate. Your posts are truly great and bookmarked. Regards
4- best regards to YOU healthyandskinnyproducts! Now move along.
Santa clara county bbs amateur radio, mature mums, Adult text sms, Adult sensual poems, Family guy cartoon porn, Jennifer connolly nude, Older adults barriers to resources
3- I am trying to figure out what amateur radio has to do with porn… it escapes me
Did you hear the one about the farmer and the priest? email me!
2- Did you hear the one about the asshole sent to the trash file?
Hot live nude girls, gay men, twinks & daddies, dominatrix and more! free downloads
1- geeee, just what I always wanted!
*delete forever*
At least until tomorrow. Tune in soon for another rousing edition of NAME THAT SPAM!!
Until then… mancandy!
He’s saying SPAM GIVES ME A HEADACHE!
Thursday 13: Younger reading
I blame Jeannie Lin for this. She mentioned the first book and it started me down memory lane and damn, there are a lot of potholes in that road. Anyway, here are 13 books I read when I was far to young(under 16) that helped shape me. Some were fabulous, others, well, they taught me something so I guess that means they were important. I can pinpoint something I learned in each of these books that, in some way, shaped who I am.
